Monday, March 27, 2006

PSSA

I haven't been writing much because I've been discouraged and disgusted by everything. We've been taking our PSSA tests for the past week and the kids don't know what to do with the changes in the schedule. They don't adapt well to change and lash out as a result. There are lots of angry kids in my classroom.

I've been watching them take their tests and their behaviors are very frustrating. I've been drilling them in test taking skills, essay writing, math, and literacy and I'll be damned if they don't go back to their original testing methods when the actual test begins; ie, they answer randomly, give one word essay answers, and finish the test modules in minutes instead of hours. It's so f@$%ing frustrating!!! I'll get the blame when my kids took a dump on the test. They don't care and no one will hold them responsible.

I've got to get out of the inner city. I'm tired of this sh%t! Can anyone tell me the point of this?

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Awfulness

It's easy to forget in the midst of everything how awful the lives of my students can be. Many of them lead hellish lives. A mother came to school the other day high on angel dust. She was seeing visions and receiving messages from the televison. She was taken to the hospital and hasn't returned. My student is terrified, shocked, and embarrassed over what happened. Consequently, he's a holy terror in class.

My students suffer from neglect. I feel so bad for them. It makes my heart hurt to know that I cannot do much to help them, that I can't make much of a difference.